Oldflatfoot works

[oldman45]

There was a really bad motor vehicle accident on Main Blvd in Oldflatfoot's town. It was messy with bodies laying about and none of the other officers wanted to do the report. Sworn to serve, Oldflatfoot reluctantly agreed to write the report.

He pulled out his report form and began to write: "Officers arrive to find the following: Chevrolet in ditch. Ford in ditch. Deceased female in ditch. Headless male in ditch. Male head found in middle of Bularavard," Seeing that Boulevard did not look right. He marked it out and spelled it Bullavord. Deciding that was not right, he marked it out and spelled it Bolluavard. Now he was upset that he was having so much difficulty, he looked around to see who may be looking. Once he was sure nobody was watching, he took his foot and kicked the head into the ditch. Oldflatfoot marks through all his spelling mistakes and then writes:

Head in DITCH

Report completed.

 

[feralmerril]

This guy found a stiff that was shot and called 911. The girl asked him the location. He said on lankersheim and 2nd. She asked him to spell lankersheim. He just hung up and called back 15 minuets latter and said, "Ah drug that succka over to main st. I kin spell that!

 

[Iggy]

I Knew and old timer that "attended" traffic accidents. First thing when he arrived.. "Get them dammed cars out of traffic."

His report always stated, Vehicles moved upon arrival, no measurements taken.

He and I were working a street dance after a rodeo one night. A guy came running up and reported a fight over in the alley.

I started to run over to stop the fight, but Ol Stu said, "Slow down, if we take a bit of time, the fight will be over. One guy will be gone, and the other one will be glad to see us."

 

[handejector]

Works for me.
I respect efficiency.

 

[charlie sherrill]

I was riding with my training officer in 1969. He got tired and decided to let me drive the patrol car. I'd been there about two weeks and it was my first time to drive. We got a fight call at a local bar. I excellerated as I turned on the red lights and just as I was going to turn on the siren he told me to slow down and turn off the lights. When I asked him why he said "Don't get in any hurry, I either want them tired or gone when I get there." I later found out what he meant.

 

[4011]

Training officer told me. Don't go into the house with out me. I wandered on up and the lady says I hit my grandson in the head with a ball bat. So how bad could that be. Till the grandson took me thru the screen and back outside on my back. Took myself and the training officer alot of swings with the flashlights to clam him down. Your right. I always walked behind him from then own. May he rest in peace.

 

[MTS Cop]

I remember a story about an old beat cop who found a dead body on Kosciuszko Street. He couldn't spell it so he dragged the guy around the corner to Lewis Ave. The days before cameras I guess.

 

[sophie]

Looks like things are never the way it happens.



_______
James