What's your favorite Chuck Norris joke?

[mr.magnum]

the two i have in mind are too vulgar to post here. someone might get offended.

 

[NFrameFred]

Chuck Norris took a flight on Virgin Airlines . . . now they're just known as "The Airlines"

 

[truckemup97]

Chuck Norris made the big bang, just by snapping his fingers.

 

[CAJUNLAWYER]

Chuck Norris won the 1983 World Series Poker. He held a Joker and a Get Out of Jail Free Monopoly card. The board flopped a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
To this day they call it the "Chuck Norris" hand.
Chuck Norris can swallow a rubik's cube and three minutes later throw it up solved.

 

[bubbiesdad]

 

[ServiceGun]

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

 

[mgjohn]

Chuck Norris's secret hide out is at the center of the sun.

 

[lowhog]

I can kick Chuck Norris butt. Now thats funny !!!

 

[kmyers]

Chuck Norris is who watches over the The Watchmen.

The Comedian was the funniest one of the bunch.

 

[Bullseye 2620]

Bullseye

 

[Frailer]

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, because "hunting" implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

 

[LVSteve]

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Now that's clever.

There are no doors in Chuck Norris's house. Who needs doors when you can walk through walls.

 

[M28]

Chuck Norris built the house he was born in.


(Can't take credit, think I saw it here on the Forum.)

Brian~

 

[Swissman]

Chuck Norris is the only actor who needs a stuntmen for crying-scenes.

 

[snake charmer]

Who's Chuck Norris?

 

[38-44HD45]

Chuck Norris does not do pushups. He pushes, and the Earth moves down.

 

[gaucho1]

Chuck Norris can tell you

"How many chucks can a woodchuck chuck?"









But it irritates him ........................................................... A Lot

 

[Bullseye 2620]

Bullseye

 

[mod29fan]

Legend has it that Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin under his beard.....just a third fist. (line from a Family Guy episode)

 

[viceunit]

Ghosts are caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.