Makeing plans for the final exit.

[shouldazagged]

A man I knew many years ago ran a crematorium here. The law said that the body had to arrive in some kind of container. A wooden or cardboard box was preferred because the law also stated the container was to be burned with the body. This was in the early '60's, and one body arrived in a $4000 solid copper casket the funeral director had foisted on the family. Maybe $20,000 today. It took eighteen hours to reduce.

My friend later ran into the funeral director on the street and asked him how he could sleep at night. The guy just smiled.

Our funeral customs are pretty damn reminiscent of ancient Egypt.

 

[Brian41]

I've buried two parents and my mother in law so far and know what funeral expenses are and the condition we are in when burying loved ones. That is not the time for dealing on prices nor do you want to do so and likely will pay the asking prices no question.
My wife and I bought two plots at a local cemetery along side with my in laws and have that taken care of. Since we have no children we have a local bank handling our estate and plan on seeing about prepaid funerals as well. Both of my parents did so and made arrangements easier and my mother in law did not and led to making arrangements that much harder at a time when one would not want to deal with such things.
Another thing to be concerned with is updated wills. Ours are a few years old and need updating as situations have changed and we need to keep them updated.
As for my demise I figure I won't care as I'm dead but do have concerns for family and will try and make it as easy as possible for them. I've given my wife instructions as to off loading my guns and which need to go somewhere special.
My cousin and I have a pack where which ever dies first the other gets first two picks on our gun collections before they get sold or given away.

 

[KKECK5]

My folks years and years ago bought a cemetery plot that holds eight. My grandparents and parents are resting there already. There's still room for my brother and his wife, and the wife and me later. My wife said i need to go first, cause she likes to be on top. I will continue to feel cheap and used.

 

[CGhelofxr]

Cook me, mix the ashes into a reef ball mixture drop me into the water and come visit and see what takes the hook.

 

[CAJUNLAWYER]

I want my body to be stitched up in a canvas shroud, placed in a plain pine coffin (not a casket) and buried in a cemetary with a simple marker that gives my name dob and dod and says as my epitaph "loved God, loved his wife, loved his children. I did the best I could." I want someone hundreds of years to pass by and at least know I walked this earth and tried.

 

[Rule3]

As I am 50% Norwegian I want a Viking Funeral but they frown upon torching your own boat here.(Figured Mrs Rule could get the insurance money so I would be worth something)

So that leaves cremation and forming me into one of the artificial reefs they have around here. That would be cool.

My original plan was a Tupperware Burp and Seal Casket but they no longer make Harvest Gold or Avocado Green so it just lost it's wow factor!

My FIL wanted cremation, ashes put in a Folgers can and sprinkled in the Muddy Mississippi. That's what we did with a whole gaggle of friends and family!

 

[arjay]

I like the idea of having my ashes tossed off of a high peak into a good breeze.

 

[Kid44]

Before my wife and I settled on cremation, I toyed with the idea of being mummified and propped up on the deck, making an obscene jesture toward traffic going by. Too expensive. What's next? There is no next.

There has to be a "next" it's just that no one has come back to tell us what it may be.

 

[Rick Bowles]

My wife says she's going to have me cremated and my ashes put into an hour glass so she can get some work out of me.

 

[SmokeStack Lightning]

The absolute thang everone should have is a Legal Last Will and Testament.

If you haven't prepared one yet, get it done.

I, myself, wouldn't use an app. for that, either. I had mine drawn up by the family attorney for $150.

If you want your children to rest easy after you're gone, have a Will drawn up by an attorney who knows what he/she is doing, so your last wishes aren't contested legally.

Greed comes out of folks you would never expect to be greedy.
It's like their pupils become dollar signs.

Make out a will.

 

[CAJUNLAWYER]

The absolute thang everone should have is a Legal Last Will and Testament.

If you haven't prepared one yet, get it done.

I, myself, wouldn't use an app. for that, either. I had mine drawn up by the family attorney for $150.

If you want your children to rest easy after you're gone, have a Will drawn up by an attorney who knows what he/she is doing, so your last wishes aren't contested legally.

Greed comes out of folks you would never expect to be greedy.
It's like their pupils become dollar signs.

Make out a will.

I like the way you talk

eriously though, I agree as thee are set rules laid out for what happens in the absence of a will and there is a lot of stuff where they are no rules. A will is a necessity and probably the best $150 you will ever spend.
That's all it tales in 99% of the cases-I'm not talking about serious estate planning here just a simple last will and testament which will suffice for most all of us (me included) If I die without a will all my property goes to my children but my wife has the use of it until she dies. Much easier for me to make a will saying "everything goes to my wife" and let her decide who gets what. I'm dead and really won't care .

 

[blujax01]

In June, Luscious found out she had a brain tumor. They removed it but it was malignant. There is an 85% probability that she will be dead in 18 to 24 months. And that makes this conversation very real for me.

We did the legal Last Will thing and it is her wish that her body be donated to science. Her cancer is exceedingly rare, affecting about 3 people per 100,000 and anything that can shed a light on it may help someone else in the future.

It doesn't matter what the funeral is like. She'll be gone off on the Ultimate Adventure and after 35 years of marriage, I will be alone.

 

[BearBio]

Before the wife talked me out of it and into a more "sensible" approach (see above), I wanted all my firearms piled up in one room. All my male relatives strip naked, cover themselves with oil, enter another room and lock the door, and my wife tosses in a single, LARGE Bowie knife. To the victor, belongs the spoils!

 

[BLACKHAWKNJ]

I have been doing RevWar artillery for some years. At one of the big reenactments-say Monmouth-they can stuff me down the barrel and fire me out over the battlefield and say "He went out with a bang!"

 

[Rule3]

In June, Luscious found out she had a brain tumor. They removed it but it was malignant. There is an 85% probability that she will be dead in 18 to 24 months. And that makes this conversation very real for me.

We did the legal Last Will thing and it is her wish that her body be donated to science. Her cancer is exceedingly rare, affecting about 3 people per 100,000 and anything that can shed a light on it may help someone else in the future.

It doesn't matter what the funeral is like. She'll be gone off on the Ultimate Adventure and after 35 years of marriage, I will be alone.

That is so sad to here. I wish both you and your wife the best in your time remaining.

 

[Onomea]

Blujax01, that is very tough. May God be with your wife and you. I suppose it is a hard time that must come to nearly all couples, when one passes before the other, and the surviving spouse is left alone, but that sure doesn't make it any easier... There are several guys in that unfortunate position here on the board.

 

[carpriver]

On February 9, 2009 my wife and I and my oldest son lost our youngest son and brother. Our son left behind 2 daughters and a 38 foot mobile home. In 2001 our son had a injury at work, he was lifting a jack hammer that had gotten stuck. He thought he had hurt his back. He took the next day off and laid on the sofa trying to deal with the pain. He went to work the next and was put on light duty and was floating some concrete. He collapsed, his partner called the EMT and he was taken to the local ER in. The doctor found a problem she could not handle and had the boy air lifted to Ashville NC St. Joseph Hospital, he was admitted to the cardiac unit. He had a tear in his descending aorta. For two weeks we didn't know if he would live or die. We sat with him and held his hand and prayed for him and his children. He pulled through. But he was not able to back to work. He would be a blood pressure meds the rest of his life. The doctor told him if he took his meds and stayed sober he could live a long life. Well he didn't stay sober and when he ran out of meds he waited until he had money to buy his meds. he had been out of meds to 2 weeks prior to his death, and the tear had reopened and he waited to long to call the EMT and he died on the operating table at just after midnight. He had called earlier in the evening and I had talked to him for about 45 minutes. We talked about guns, his girls, his attending NA & AA meeting ,just stuff in general. the last thing I said to him before I hung up was what I said to him and his brother every day I talked to them was "I love you son". We had a simple gathering of his AA/NA family just to said a final farewell.

I do understand that funerals are for the living and a chance for the living to say a final goodbye. But for me to add to the problems of planning a funeral is something I would not want to put on my wife or son. I tell my wife several times a day I love her. I tell my son every time I talk to him that I love him and proud of him, and I tell my grand daughters I love them. That is all I am able to give them and what they need to know about me; I loved them and have done every thing in my power to take care of them and protect them. A funeral is a place where people stand around and think how lucky there are still alive.

A few years ago I was in a tough spot. I told God I had had enough of the daily stuff I was dealing with. I had a dream ; In the dream I felt this heavy weight pressing on me. I knew I was dying, the weight just got heavier and heavier and I was getting closer and closer to death. I then remember saying God I am not ready to go yet. I have more strength then I thought. The next night I had a second dream, God was telling me I needed to stop joking around and be more serious about my work and in dealing with my clients. I ask if he was serious, and if so I would stop clowning around. God said Norm I am just messing with you, lighten up life is short, laugh.

If my wife decides to have a funeral and a wake I hope there is 60 & 70 rock and roll, and lots of jokes told. But I would still like to go with very little fan fare. If my life has to be summed up in a few words. Let it be, I love my family, and I did the best I could.

This thread was longer then I had expected. OH I saw death up close in 1968 at Camly airfield Dalat RVN. February 3,

 

[blujax01]

God Bless you, Carpriver.

 

[Taurus627]

I, too, asked for the cremation thing then just throw me out with the garbage, it don't matter.
I don't fear death, after loosing my first wife in 2008 I have learned to accept it as part of life. I believe we will be reunited in heaven and live happy for the rest of eternity.

 

[arjay]

That is a tough one Carp.My ex ( and kids mother) has fought,and is loosing,the battle with booze.After 28 years I left.I've spent the last 5 years waiting for that phone call.