I'm surprised that in spite of numerous posts so far, many saying what they have instructed the family to do etc, that no one has mentioned pre planning, and paying for your own funeral.
That way you can choose the type of services the mortuary does. If you choose a conventional casket and burial, you can pick out the material, color, type of interior furnishing, etc., and take all of the potential guilt from the family having to make the arrangements. The younger you are, the less it costs, and even when a person is well past retirement age, cremation, including remains pick up, a display urn for the ashes, use of the mortuary for possible required services, it cost me less than $2K. My wife chose a more conventional type of disposal, with her cost close to $5K, which is about half of most funeral costs. There is a long list of items you check off or fill in the blanks, such as songs you request, and many other things we are unaware of until you have to face it after a loved one is gone, and you are not thinking well plus are vulnerable. Then any veteran who has an honorable discharge is entiteled a no cost burial, including a military service, for both you and your spouse. It is the cheapest way to go for a dignified disposal, plus allows you to make the choices. The chosen mortuary buys a single premium life insurance policy on you with the money, and the proceeds pay for the serviced chosen. Check it out.