GOOD One Liners - or even not so good ...

[fordson]

"never share a foxhole with anyone braver then you."

"Remember, Tracers work both ways"

"That which you come by too easily, you value to lightly."

 

[waxman]

From Robert Ruark on Cape buffalo.
" He looks at you like you owe him money"

 

[Bajadoc]

Never trust an atom. They make up everything.

 

[Bajadoc]

Hold my beer and watch this.

 

[chaparrito]

She says "you'll miss me when I'm gone"

I say sure I will, even a rotten tooth leaves a hole.

 

[Maddog 521]

The best way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

 

[30-30remchester]

Doing a good job around here is like peeing in a wool suit. It gives you a warn feeling but nobody notices.

 

[STCM(SW)]

"Don't worry, I've done this hundreds of times."

 

[Maddog 521]

"no matter where you go, there you are"

 

[30-30remchester]

A few more
Harder than woodpecker lips.
If he actually has his ducks in a row, they must be decoys.
As sexy as socks on a rooster.
The results of his IQ test was negative.
More messed up than a tomato soup sandwich.
Lady, when you become a mother, can I have one of the pups?
Can't be seen by a man on a galloping horse.
She would lie if the truth was on sale.
He has enough money to burn a wet mule.

 

[sheepdawg]

Never give a sucker an even break.

I'm going to step outside for a breath of fresh smoke.

Prettier than a speckled pup.

He doesn't have enough money to pay attention.

Your so low you'd have to look up to see down.

 

[BigBill]

Bacall to Bogart you know how to whistle? Just put your lips together and blow.

 

[islamoradamark]

id rather be lookin at it , than lookin for it

 

[islamoradamark]

is you or aint you my baby

 

[islamoradamark]

if it aint broke dont fix it

 

[Chuck24]

Henny Youngman is still dead

 

[snuffy51]

He was so ugly, when he was born, his mama carried him around for two weeks upside down.

 

[soFlaNative]

If he/she had to haul *** it'd take two trips.

Women that carry a little extra weight live longer than men that mention it.

 

[TX-Dennis]

I've got a photographic memory, but I ran out of film years ago.

 

[Ron M.]

Free advice is seldom cheap.