Inspired insults!

[Engineer1911]

Long ago, I had a boss who was a former Marine. His management style was pure intimidation. In one of our micromanagement meetings, I told him, "The only thing in my life that I hate more than the house I live in is working for you." The sputtering was priceless.

He had two big fears: 1] becoming unemployed, 2] losing his MacMansion in the prestigious subdivision.

 

[PALADIN85020]

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)

I would say that is a compliment rather then an insult.
I hate writers (including news media writers) that use words that the average person doesn't know.

I think it should be each writer's goal to eschew obfuscation.

John

 

[Krogen]

I think it should be each writer's goal to eschew obfuscation.

John

Gesundheit!

 

[Protocall_Design]

Writer #42 missed the goalpost with that pun(t).

 

[Willyboy]

Insults

Rodney Dangerfield had a bunch of insults along the” I Don’t get no respect line.”

My favorite: I was so ugly when I was born, the Doctor slapped my mother. Willyboy

 

[robvious]

I think it should be each writer's goal to eschew obfuscation.

John

to be voraciously loquacious achieves nothing without gregarious intellectual expanses

 

[oldbrownhat]

Wish I could have met Winnie. Another of his encounters, with a woman, regarding her line of work and pricing, is classic.

"Wink, wink, nudge, nudge..."

 

[oldbrownhat]

I consider Mark Twain, champion of the art.Chubbo

This, absolutely. His wit is just as sharp and appropriate as it was when he was alive.

This one, from Paladin's list, I had not heard, but I'm still chuckling at it: "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"

Although the Billy Wilder one, "He has Van Gogh's ear for music " nearly did me in.

 

[oldbrownhat]

...Do it in a way that they don't fully get it until after you are gone.

In a similar vein is the definintion of a diplomat as "someone who can tell you to go to h*** in such a way that you look forward to the trip."

 

[walkin jack]

How can I miss you if you won't go away?

He was so unpopular as a child his mother had to tie a pork chop around his neck so the dog would play with him.

He was so fat his mother had to iron his shirt on the driveway.

We were so poor the roaches and rats moved out

We were so poor that a burglar that broke in couldn't find anything to seal so he left a $20 on the table

I was just passing by and thought I'd drop in.
Why don't you keep on going till you get to the river and THEN drop in