Makeing plans for the final exit.

My soul will leave for the ever after as soon as I die. My fortune will go to the debtors. :rolleyes:

I don't care about my body. We could donate it to "How not to treat garbage and eat it too".

Ashes to ashes or feed me to the fish.

Hoffentlich nicth so bald.
 
A lot of good thoughts put down so far. My oldest son has the instructions, but I doubt my wife will honor them. Its simple, just dispose of the body.

My long time coroner friend was agast (he was also an undertaker). He thought it wrong to cheat him or his co workers out of their due. Regardless, its what I want. I agree with all the guys saying they don't want a service or viewing. If they've got to dispose of the body all legal like, then just shovel me into the cardboard box and turn up the flames. Oldest son also knows where I'd like him to dump the ashes. Even that idea has its detractors. Seems like if anyone finds them, it causes a big stink while they try to figure out who it was.

So I like the idea the guy above had about not even calling the kids or anything. Of course that won't happen, they'll show up and everyone will cry and feel awful. Disrupt everyone's lives for a week or so. And to no good end. They won't be crying for me, but to make my wife cry even more. If she does. She might celebrate, who knows. I've sure taken her places where she won't drive herself. Even she says she likes the Colorado mountains. But she lacks the driving skill or confidence to go some of the crazy places I like.

Guess I need to get planning pretty soon. My dad died a while back. I'll be that age in 3 1/2 years. That's probably when the genetics will quit working. Anything past that is borrowed time at best.

So my plans on disposing of the guns is well known. My wife said she'd just let our sons take their pick. I told her that was stupid, that she should have David Carroll stop at the house and take the guns he wanted and thought he could sell. Then let the boys pick from the dregs of what's left. Those are probably the guns that I used the most but had the least value. Don't let family cherry pick a collection. She might need the money some day.

Maybe I'll select some guns for certain grandkids. That'll bend everyone out of shape. Serve them right for coveting my goodies. I'm guessing they'll dread hauling all the ammo and components out of the dungeon.
 
I came across a woman's ashes while fishing last week.They had tied her tag to a bush,just off the side of the road in Poudre Canyon.I thought that was a bit rude.Dump mine up a jeep road at least!
 
I bought & paid for my services in 1997. Everything is paid for. Have my plot in a small Sierra Nevada town cemetary & will be between my folks & my first wife, Eleanor. No cremation for me. Have a living trust will to give the kids what I believe they would want.
 
I went through a bad divorice and had a lady from england live with me as I had a seven year old daughter and worked graveyard. At the time I was fighting for custody and needed a nanny. We worked up a deal where I supplied everything and she worked at a store for her money.
We lived together for about 12 years. She got stomach cancer and died at home with me. She was divoriced and had no family. She had no medical insurance and things fell on me. She had me take her home from the hospital and died about a week later. Since we werent married and she died in my house the system called the shots and she was cremated. I bought the ashs from the county as I just didnt want her spread in a community garden or whatever they do. I took her deer hunting with me on a mountain top that I once had taken her to that she liked.
I hadnt seen another hunter or vehicle in the area. I spread the ashs, and started to say the lords prayer. I was interupted by a rifle shot very close by. it sounded like only 50 yards away. I walked out and looked around and never did see a hunter or vehicle!
 
My last wishes are: cremate me and put my ashes in a Miracle Whip jar for all I care. My friends already know who is getting what of my guns. Then when everyone is assured I'm really on my way to the next great adventure and not pulling another fast one, have one hell of a party. I've already put funds away to pay for it. Listen to some good music, enjoy some good food, and drink some good liquor. But most of remember I'll be watching ya have a good time on my dime.
 
olcop said:
Donated my body to a medical school, they pay for the embalming, use my body for training doctors and cremate the remains and return to my family.
I like to think that for the many times other doctors have saved my life in the last 12 years, some new doctors can learn something from me.
I want no funeral, no marker, nothing to show I was ever here. I've told all my brothers and my son and daughter of my wishes (by certified mail no less) and my wife has a file folder with the instructions on who to call.
olcop
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This is EXACTLY what I want. Funerals are just an excuse for the survivors to feel sorry for themselves.
 
yaktamer said:
This is EXACTLY what I want. Funerals are just an excuse for the survivors to feel sorry for themselves.
Click to expand...

That's awfully harsh. Is it somehow weak or self-pitying for people to hurt over the loss of a loved one? And to share it with others who loved the deceased? Is struggling with the reality of no longer having someone you love in your life simply feeling sorry for yourself?

When my wife died we held her memorial service in the church where we married. It seated 200. There were 400 in the building and more standing outside in a bitter-cold January rain. It was their tribute to that remarkable woman, and their way of telling me and her kids that they were there for us.

I'll never forget that outpouring of love and support.

Didn't seem to me like an "excuse" for anything. Nor did I consider my grieving merely "feeling sorry for myself".
 
shouldazagged said:
That's awfully harsh. Is it somehow weak or self-pitying for people to hurt over the loss of a loved one? And to share it with others who loved the deceased? Is struggling with the reality of no longer having someone you love in your life simply feeling sorry for yourself?

When my wife died we held her memorial service in the church where we married. It seated 200. There were 400 in the building and more standing outside in a bitter-cold January rain. It was their tribute to that remarkable woman, and their way of telling me and her kids that they were there for us.

I'll never forget that outpouring of love and support.

Didn't seem to me like an "excuse" for anything. Nor did I consider my grieving merely "feeling sorry for myself".
Click to expand...


Okay, I over-generalized and certainly meant no offense. Just that I've only been to one memorial service that was really a celebration of the departed's life that was completely free of any self-pity. No disrespect intended to those who disagree or who have had more favorable experiences.
 
I am curious as to why the OP was facing death in Vietnam in 1986... (A typo, perhaps?)

My wife can decide what to do with me when I die. I don't have strong feelings about it.
 
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When my mother passed away her wishes were to be cremated and buried, no service and no obituary. Well we had her cremated and buried at the State Veteran's Cemetery in Black Mountain, NC. There was a charge of a bit over $900 for the cremation and death certificates. No charge for the burial or the cemetery plot. She had (free) access to a family plot in New Jersey where she grew up and where her mother and some other relatives are buried. Trouble is, no one would ever visit the grave. We had a life service for her at the retirement community where she lived the last 8 or 9 years. She had a lot of people who held her in high regard there. We also put an obit in the Hendersonville paper and the Clarion, PA paper. Hospice gave us a paper with a list of cremation suppliers and prices.

As for me, I have avoided expressing certain wishes and I usually answer just do what you feel is right. I would prefer to be buried high where it will never flood.

I had a friend who when he died at age 62 of cancer I went to the viewing. I waited 3-4 hours in line to walk past the casket.
 
Told my wife I want to be cremated wearing my Vigil Sash of the OA and my Apron, and I need two silver dollars got to pay the Boatman. Scatter my ashes amongst the graves of my ancestors. And remind everyone I ll see them again. I just hope if she sells any of my guns she sells them for what they are worth not what I told her I paid for them.


Sent from my Kindle Fire using Tapatalk 2
 
We have a mantle with the ashes of all our beloved, furry children. I will be burned in a cardboard box and all our ashes mixed. Wife can join us if she wishes. Then, all of us will be scattered together in some wild place. For my service, Requiem by Robert Louis Stevenson.

A Masonic Service.
 
plans for the final exit

brucev said:
I have been conducting funerals since 1983. Funerals are for those who are left alive. Those who are planning their own funeral should at a minimum consider those who will be left. Anything else is simply selfishness.
Click to expand...

Yeah, and it might cheat you out of an overpriced funeral.
olcop:mad:
 
Olcop, I am willing to bet almost every preacher there is or was, will do a funeral for free if the family is poor. Every one I was involved with asked nothing but we always just gave a card with money in it and price was never discussed with our funnerals or weddings in the churchs I went to plus I never ever heard of it with the exception of people going to those commercial wedding chaples like vegas and elsewhere.
 
I'm told that some cultures, like the Roma (Gypsies), mourn a birth because it's the beginning of a live of travail, and celebrate a death as a release from life's troubles. I know that many years ago a local funeral home was pretty much trashed when a Gypsy tribal queen died. Hell of a party, apparently.

A woman from Northern Ireland I met a long time ago told a group of us about the wakes they held when she was a girl. She said there was in every village a cadre of old ladies who attended every wake for the free food and booze. The dear departed would be laid out on a table in his home, and the old girls would stand looking at the body and say things like, "Ah, thank God it was nothing serious!"
 
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riverrat38 said:
They can fire up the Alice May on Lake Lebarge and shovel in the coal;
or, less troublesome, just put my body on am airliner as checked baggage and I will never be heard of again!

Best,
Rick
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I see I'm not the only Robert Service fan on the Forum.:cool:

"Since I left Plumtree down in Tennessee, it's the first time I've been warm".:D
Jim
 
My Pop is buried in Arlington, Mom is gonna join him there.

Both had pre-arranged funerals and it's the only way to go, especially for the ones you leave behind.

Ima getting cremated, mostly scattered (don't care where) then a portion of my ashes are going to the plot Pop bought before WW2. I share the same name as him. Just gotta change the dates on the marker. CHEAP!
 
Shouldazagged mentioned a gypsey funneral. Gotta tell this one my co worker told me. He had a side job of riding funeral escourts. They had a gypsey funeral of supposedly the "Gypsey king" or equivent. He was curious and peeked in to see how they did it. Gypseys were fileing past the casket and throwing money and jewelry in it. The widow was weeping etc. Then she asked the funneral director to have a minute alone with her husband before he closed the casket. Joe said he peeked around a curtain to watch her. She gathered up envelopes, money and jewlery and spitted on her dead husbands face!
 
final exit

feralmerril said:
Olcop, I am willing to bet almost every preacher there is or was, will do a funeral for free if the family is poor. Every one I was involved with asked nothing but we always just gave a card with money in it and price was never discussed with our funnerals or weddings in the churchs I went to plus I never ever heard of it with the exception of people going to those commercial wedding chaples like vegas and elsewhere.
Click to expand...
Feralmerril,
the comment was aimed at funeral directors, not priests or preachers---however, I care for neither, probably the result of my being a LEO.
olcop:mad:
 
Thanks. I see you answered brucev`s post, he`s a preacher, not a funeral director. I didnt know if you knew that from reading old posts of his or not.
I do think one of the biggest rip off business`s in this country is the funeral industry trying to sell exspendsive caskets etc. It hits all relatives at a sad time, probley already has been exspendsive medical bills leaing up to the death and then maybe given a sales pitch that may put a guilt trip on you as a selling point. That is one job I couldnt handle though.
 
This guy died and wanted to be buried in his cadilac. They got a big boom truck out there and as the man was being lowered in the huge grave, he was wearing a derby hat, had a stogie in his mouth and jug in his hand, a couple of his old friends were watching and one told the other, now man, dats what I call living!
 
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