Old Sayings

[Chubbo]

My father and I, were constantly at odds, when I was a teenage punk, and he had an endless supply of sayings to support his beliefs, and views. Some of them were blatant, some were flagrant, and some pretty salty, and he never used them in earshot of ladies, or young ins.

All of his sayings were meaningful.

Some of you have shared sayings by, respected elders, or your Pappy. I’ll share a couple, that came from Dad, or my respected elders. Hopefully they won’t offend anyone. You be the judge.

It fits like a saddle on a sow.

Fly high, and land in a cow ****.

If sharing Old Sayings, proves agreeable with everyone concerned, and I find the gumption, I may offer other Old Sayings, occasionally.

Chubbo

 

[Laketime]

Your's is not to reason why Your's is just to do or die.If I had a dollar every time I heard that I could buy a registered magnum.

 

[lihpster]

"I'm telling you honey, the boy ain't right."

 

[Rustyt1953]

 

[Protocall_Design]

I have sayings I call "Ancient Chinese Proverbs I just made up".

One of them is "Experience is what you get right after you need it".

 

[Kinman]

Shining like a dime in a goat's ...

 

[robvious]

Figures don't lie.. but liars use figures...

2 wrongs don't make a right.. but 2 Wrights made an airplane.

2 wrongs don't make a right, but 3 lefts do..

both of my parents were accountants.. amazing that I turned out close to normal.. not normal, but close.

 

[Ivan the Butcher]

both of my parents were accountants.. amazing that I turned out close to normal.. not normal, but close.

Before the advent of electronic computers, the people that did computations were called a computer. In the early 50's my mom was a computer! My brother is almost normal, I'm nowhere near normal! My wife is very close to normal, and we produced 4 wonderful almost normal kids, and the combined have 9 almost normal kids. 2 or 3 are often confused for normal. 2 will never be confused for normal, but I'm expecting great thing from them!

Many people confuse boring with normal. My descendants never will be boring or confused with normal! But they are the ones everyone calls on in crisis!

Ivan

 

[pmanton]

Better people think you a fool, than to open your mouth and prove it.

 

[zeke]

It's not what your title is, it's who listens to ya.
Beware of behind kissers, if ya have to sit down quick ya might get bit
better to reward people who fix mistakes, than to punish those who make them
The more credit given, the more work that gets done
A rich man and his lawyer is no match for an educated redneck with an attitude
A Pa ridgerunners spelling of expert is exspurt, and we all are one

 

[SnidelyWhiplash]

“I won’t belong to any club that would have me as a member.” Groucho Marx

“You’re only as old as the women you feel.” Groucho Marx

“The only thing you leave behind is your name…leave a good one.” My Grandfather

“When your dead you're dead a long time!” My father

“The money looks better in my pocket then theirs.” My mother

“I don't watch the dollars…I watch the pennies. Watch the pennies and the dollars take care of themselves.” My first boss

 

[30-30remchester]

Harder than woodpecker lips

It aint no ride on a pink duck

She was cold the world thought the Titanic ran into her

Diplomacy is saying "nice doggy" while looking for a rock

If not for the gutter your mind would be homeless

Trying to understand you is like trying to smell the color 9

You have a mind like a steel trap. Rusty and illegal in 47 states.

Has the personality of adobe

If all your ducks are in a row, they must be decoys

I've seen your face on a bottle of iodine

As messed up as a tomato soup sandwich

Don't have the energy to cuss a cat

I am not conceited even though I have the right to be

Stupidity has no average

Don't dim someone's else's shine

 

[Chuck24]

Never lie to the bungee guy about how much you weigh

 

[BLACKHAWKNJ]

You're not the only pebble on the beach.
The sun doesn't rise and set with you.
People who can't spend more than ten seconds a day thinking about anybody but themselves.
The worst part of growing up is finding out your parents never did.

 

[llowry61]

You can put lipstick on a pig but it is still a pig
Don't piss on my shoes and tell me it's raining
To whom much is given much is expected
If wishes were horses beggars would ride
colder than a well diggers .....

To share just a few - my dad had lots of them

 

[Rustyt1953]

All my dad's old sayings were plagiarized.

 

[Willyboy]

Sayings

My dad would use the word “Ducky”, usually with a profane modifier.
Such as “ You kids did what!? Well, that’s ##&@$ ducky.”
I smile whenever I think about it. Willyboy

 

[Jinglebob]

One from my dad: "Remember to load your brain before you shoot your mouth off."

 

[steelslaver]

My old man "Sound as a dollar"

Raining like a cow squirting on a flat rock

Blacker than a prune in a coal miners lunch box

Sweating like a workin girl in church

In church, the worst sinners usually sit in the first row.

Colder than a well diggers butt in Alaska

Dumber than a box of rocks

Lights on but nobody is home

His clutches are slipping

The early birds may get the worms, but weasels never get sucked up in a jet engine.

If a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his *** when he hopped

MY mom "Why wish for a loaf of bread, when you can wish for the whole grocery store."

and my favorite, If brains were dynamite, he wouldn't be able to blow his nose

 

[Golddollar]

He couldn't pour the water out of a boot if the directions were written on the heel.

There's a butt for every saddle.

If the older generation didn't pass along its knowledge to the younger generation, we'd still be living in caves.