This reminds me of the time that two of my pals and I decided to take the wives out for dinner. One of these guys was Bob, about whom I have written before-- a great friend but something of a know-it-all.
Bob was about six feet tall and tipped the scales north of four hundred pounds. He was a master joke teller and a real character.
My other pal, Dave, was the only one of us who actually took hunting seriously, and loved to razz everyone about their poor shooting, bad hats, etc. A great guy, though.
Anyway, as we were making this dinner plan at a local bar, Dave suggests t we have a contest, the winner of which got to drink all night for free.
The contest?
See who could conceal the most handguns on his person when we went to dinner (we had plenty, believe me!)
I knew Dave was up to no good, so when it came time to dress for dinner, I eschewed the whole pistol-packing idea and went unarmed.
...as did Dave.
Big Bob showed up fairly bristling with bulgy gun lumps--he must have had twenty handguns! Belt holsters housing Model 27s and 29s encircled his considerable girth and he wore a shoulder holster under each arm. At each of his lower extremities, ankle holsters were filled with snubby model 10s. He had small autos in each of his sport coat pockets, mostly Walthers and Brownings. His trouser pockets held four more revolvers, Centennials and Chief Specials as I recall.
As he waddled to our table, he demanded a count from Dave and I, positive that he had won the contest. We opened out jackets and twirled around, not a heater to be found. the jig was up!
I can't tell you what a pleasure it was to buy drinks for Bob that evening! The eye roll from his wife was priceless.