How old is too old to live at home?

I was 22 when I left home but I was working full time and paying rent. I also did my share around the house. The tables have turned now. My 88 year old mom lives with my wife and i.
 
18 and working, pay R&B or move out and find out what the real world is all about. My son moved out at 18, still took him a few years to get himself together. My daughter worked her way thru 2 years community college and stayed at home, then on to finish at a 4 yr. college, lived at home afterwards for about 2 months until she got a good job and moved out of state.
 
First my three children got jobs when they were 16yo. They all wanted to pay rent I refused as long as they saved there extra money. Life can be so tough I wanted to give them a head start that I didn't have. Two have two college degrees. The other one is a wood worker. Right now they left the nest a decade+ ago. They own there own homes and new cars.

When they were younger I took them cutting firewood. I told them either you stay in school and go to college and have a strong mind. Or don't get a good education you better have a strong back.

The Apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.

My point is teach your children nothing is free in life. There isn't nothing you can do in life once your mind is made up to do it. There's an awesome world out there if you stay focused and motivated to go for it.

I didn't push them out of the house. I made sure they were ok to leave the nest when they were ready. Dad was there if they needed help but they never did.

My point is I raised three good solid adults. I have no worries when I pass on.

Take care of your children. Teach them. I taught them how to work. My misses the accountant taught them how to handle money.

Again we need to educate them about how life works.

When my kids were small they cut my lawn raked leaves, shoveled snow. I have them responsibilities early in life. I taught them that life is no free ride.

Tell them you love them often, everyday. Godbless

I was laid off for a year and just got a new job in November. My son wanted a $300 dollar RC car. I told him to put three cords of firewood in my truck so I can deliver it and you will get that car for Christmas. He did do it. Three cords of firewood was $300.

Then when we delivered firewood we passed by this deli. On the return trip we grabbed breakfast. They had a roast beef cooking. I asked them when will it be done. On my second trip we all had roast beef grinders. Or we would stop at McDonald's to eat. Mentally I instilled in them you work, you make money, you eat. It's that simple.

I miss them dearly but I know there ok.

Now my son is teaching his stepson about the value of money and hard work.

When my oldest son got his first job at McDonald's he came home that first day and told me working flipping burgers was easier than working with me. I told him I taught you what real work is like. He is a engineer now with two degrees in engineering.
 
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I made a deal with my kids when they graduated from high school. They could stay at home as long as they were a full time college student and had a job to pay for school, clothes, etc. It worked out fine for us.
 
My 57 year old brother married with his own home. He refuses to pay for garbage pick up. He piles it up in his truck and takes it to mom"s. He actually thought I would take it to the road with mom's. I told her if he is going to bring it over to her house He better do it on garbage night. There was no way I was doing it for him!!!!
 
I suppose I'm the odd duck here. I lived at home until I was 25. BUT.... my siblings were gone, mom and dad had divorced, and mom was physically unable to take care of the big, two-story house by herself - she'd contracted polio before I was born and she was weak on her right side the rest of her life. She didn't want to move away from her friends at church, and she wanted to stay where she was until she retired. I paid rent, took care of all the outside yard work (there was a whole pot-full of that every week, with a HOA to nag you about it if it didn't get done), fixed her car when it was something I was capable of doing, did my own laundry and generally took care of all the stuff mom couldn't. Heck, you wouldn't believe the amount of canning she did with me around to do the heavy lifting. I had a full-time job, working swing shift plus any overtime I could.

Does it seem a little strange to me that I lived at home that long? Yes. But there was a valid reason.
 
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I left home at 23yo my mom drove me out. When my mom divorced my dad I became the target. I was never home but to sleep. My mom was a tornado. My poor dad and older brothers. I tried to join the navy at 17yo. I married my girlfriend at the time. We been together now 41years. We started out with nothing. We worked for everything we have. I wouldn't want it any other way.

Mom still have me **** till the day she died. My kids never seen it they thought she was an angel.
I stopped talking to my dad 15 years before he passed just too much drama.
 
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GatorFarmer said:
Family is family, my children can live with me as long as they want or meed to, and when I am old, I expect to live with them. Cycle of life.
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This is how my dad put it one night when we a similar conversation. And I agree. I couldn't see kicking family out but had I been thrown out on my butt at 18 I can guarantee that the retirement home they were in later would be far far away.
 
I was in an interesting situation a few years back when one came back "home" at about 56 years old.

Actually, his parents, my Grandparents were long dead, and I owned the home.

So, I was 30 years old with a 56 year old kid that came back home.

Took two years to get him to leave, and I was really thinking about burning this place to the ground.
 
For me, it was 18. But I don't think one size fits all. And while it may be old fashioned, it seems to me that men/boys and girls/women are different, in the sense that -- in my opinion -- it is natural for girls to stay at home longer.

I also think there are parents who trap their children at home, who don't want to let them go for their own selfish reasons, including, often, emotional sustenance. Grown children need their own lives if they are to be happy.

I think, as others have written above, that as a parent you do your best to help the child grow into a self-reliant, competent adult. And that usually includes letting the child occasionally fall down and skin his or her knees along the way. Experience is, as they say, the best teacher.

I do not expect my adult children to live with me, and when I grow old I will not live with them. (It's not about kicking them out of the house. It is about instilling in them the understanding that they should be self-reliant, and the desire to be independent.) And I will not burden them -- and their spouses and thus their marriages -- with my presence in their homes in my old age. (I do expect them to come visit me though, wherever I am at that point!:))
 
J. R. WEEMS said:
Well I was gone at 17 -- Say what you will, I would give anything if ours were back home-- that being said, they need their own lives I suppose, but I miss them. Just getting old I guess. :)
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I can relate as my 2 kids (boy & girl) are out with their own families. G-kids are always a welcomed sight.
When I graduated high school as an 18 y/o, my pop said rent was due the first of every month. I never paid any but moved out not too long afterwards.
 
I have two boys, 22 and 24. I'm working up to my retirement at the end of next month, where I will sell the house and move. Told both boys that two years ago.

The youngest started saving, and with a little help bought his first house. The oldest we pushed into an apartment last week, and he would still be here if we didn't.

Short answer? Really depends on the kid. But I think the oldest is going to get a crash course in economics shortly.
 
When I got out of HS I paid room and board as I worked and it made good sense to stay at home with Mom's good cooking and cheaper than rent elsewhere. I left at 19 when getting drafted and I enlisted instead in the AF.
When I got divorced at 32 I talked with my folks about living with them a while until I sorted things out. Mom said fine but when your younger brother moved back in for a period he reverted to being a child again leaving his dirty clothes on the floor and wanting to be catered to. I said fine and moved elsewhere then.
 
If your kid is there after college for more than a few months and has no special needs...He should be gone or you didn't prepare him for life.

Pretty simple. Don't give them everything and make sure they know the value of money and don't be too easy on them because the world won't be. Reality is a tough pill to swallow when no one prepared you for it.
 
I left for college when I was 18. I hated the school so I left and applied to one that I could commute to. I commuted and lived at home. I also met my wife in between schools. Shortly after starting the 2nd school, we planned our future and got the parents on board with our plans. Part of this was that her parents preferred that we did not live together before we married. I finally left home at age 27, after working at a "grown up" job for two years. She was 24, and had her own "grown up job".

We made the mistake of renting instead of buying a house, on about an acre of land. Flash forward 10 years and the landlords wanted to raise our rent, which would not have been a problem if they would have fixed the sewage spot that had been growing in the back yard for over 2 years. We were looking for a house to buy anyway, and just waiting for the right one. When I stood my ground on not paying the increased rent until the sewage problem was fixed, we were given 30 days notice. This was one week after my wife had a c-section with our youngest daughter.

We quickly found a house and started the purchase process. Our 30 days were up before we closed so for 2 months, exactly, Myself and our oldest daughter lived with my parents. She and the baby lived with her parents.

My kids will always have a home with me. I won't enable them, but if life becomes unfair, as it seems to do a lot, I'll be here for them.

My brother also left at 27. There is 10 years between us.
 
Came home from the Army, got a job and paid room and board, amount determined by Mom. Left a little over two years later as I was getting married. The alternative was to get an apt with one or more guys. That wasn't very palatable for me, especially after three years of barracks life.
 
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