brigeton
Member
I understand not liking a stranger calling you by your first name but if friends and family can't use your first name you have a problem.
Who Told You That You Could Call Me By My First Name?
- Thread starter WardenRoss
- Start date
Well, I don't think it's from being old. And I'm pretty sure it's not a Southern thing, although manners certainly are or used to be more important in the South than in some other areas.
My own opinion is that you see exactly what is going on. I would only say that I try not to be too harsh on young 'uns that weren't raised any better. I try to figure out what they really mean, and act accordingly, and try to remember whose tongue I'm supposed to bite.
Bullseye 2620
Member
Some folks go through great trouble to get people to say their name ...
And some people never get called by their name . . .
[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYIrs1Dx4Ck[/ame]
In my trade there are many nicknames. I worked for a great guy called Ollie. When I saw the name Earl Stanic, I didn't know it was the same guy. I am known as Big Jim. I know guys like, The Cobb, Davey, Jonesy, Klag, DS, My Tye, Cowboy, Montana, Hoochie Momma, etc. We are very informal. I am a supervisor and hate to be called Sir. First of all I am not better than the people that work with me, I just serve in a different role. Plus, some of it is from the Marines, I was an NCO, not an officer and most NCOs didn't want tto or like being called a "Sir". Right after boot camp, while awaiting assignment to a ITR platoon, I spend a few days working in a supply depot. I called a Gunny "Sir". LOL whoa did he let me know my mistake. Never did that again.
My family all calls me Jimmy because as a child it separated me from Uncle and Grampa Jim. I am Jim, not James. I always addressed my family seniors by Aunt, Uncle Grandpa followed by their name. I introduce myself as Jim. I am Jim, I am proud of the Jim I am, that is all I want to be to people. My grand kids call me Gtrandpa Jimmy, my nephews uncle Jimmy, Its enough for me.
In my family if something is modified in some manner it is "Jimmyed" LOL Jimmy the modifier.
My family all calls me Jimmy because as a child it separated me from Uncle and Grampa Jim. I am Jim, not James. I always addressed my family seniors by Aunt, Uncle Grandpa followed by their name. I introduce myself as Jim. I am Jim, I am proud of the Jim I am, that is all I want to be to people. My grand kids call me Gtrandpa Jimmy, my nephews uncle Jimmy, Its enough for me.
In my family if something is modified in some manner it is "Jimmyed" LOL Jimmy the modifier.
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OP
Interesting. Here, Janes and Johns are referred to as Chicks and Dudes.
Here it comes across as being "cool" IE, perhaps a holdover from the seventies.
"Duuuuuuuuuuude! How's it goin!" happens a lot.
An interesting twist. Here, if you call a Latino gangbanger "Amigo" it's like calling a person of color "boy".
Careful how you use "Amigo."
I know, ridiculous. I lived in Oklahoma and we called everyone Amigo. Think John Wayne move...............kinda like Pilgrim.
Wait a minute, is Pilgrim still okay?????????????????
OP
Good point, if it has the prefix, it doesn't sting as much.
At least where you are from.
OP
In modern circles, as a supervisor, nicknames will get you in a world of trouble and probably fired.
I'm older, and always gave my staff nicknames. Had to stop that about ten-years ago.
I had one girl that quite often said "Gimmie a break Mr. XXXXXX". So I nicknamed her Kit Kat. Can't even think about doing that anymore. Can't refer to her as "girl" either.
I know, different subject, but I really miss nicknames.
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wingriderz
Member
Always by first name
ancient-one
US Veteran
I have lived in Oklahoma all of my life except for my time in the Navy and have heard very few use the word Amigo until the last few years when the influx began. Then it is mostly those speaking Spanish.
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Step N. Mud
Member
The Nuns at St. Rita's grade school would tell me 'Your name is MUD!'
[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=953PkxFNiko[/ame]
Step N. Mud
Member
my son is a huge Primus fan and showed me this a few years ago.
Picturing most of the respondents to this thread in their bathrobes, in their front lawns, hitting their lawn mower with a shovel . . .
Absalom
SWCA Member, Absent Comrade
Especially for folks in higher age brackets, which likely includes a lot of us here, keeping the name business simple has real advantages ...
[ame]https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kh66yZj3qlk[/ame]
[ame]https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kh66yZj3qlk[/ame]
usmc2427765
US Veteran
Us old moss backs are dealing with too many Millenials......
When young women started calling me "sir," I knew the end was near. I'm fine with my first name in any situation. If an adult introduces me to a young person as Mr. X, I'm fine with that, too. My grand children call me Papa, which I love.
Faulkner
Member
The first name thing doesn't bother me, but I do expect gentlemen to remove their hats at the dinner table.
CAJUNLAWYER
Member
Well I HATE being called Gary by phone solicitors and by people who don't know me. For those who know me Gary is always good and I encourage it. Most of the time it's Mr. Gary which I still can't wrap my mind around but I just let it go-small town thing. In New Orleans it is a bit more formal and my children's friends have always referred to me by my last name. Over the past several years it has been my pleasure to bestow upon them the acceptance of them as adults by telling them it's time to start calling me Gary. A little right of passage that has unfortunately passed.
What I find amusing is when people who don't know my wife's first name will greet her as Mrs. Gary.
I always start off a new relationship with last name and am always asked to use the first. Gives them the respect they deserve and makes for good relationships. But I really don't let my panties get in a twist about it.
One thing however is that I ALWAYS refer to elected officials by their first name only as I feel it let's them know that they work for me and not the other way around.
What I find amusing is when people who don't know my wife's first name will greet her as Mrs. Gary.
I always start off a new relationship with last name and am always asked to use the first. Gives them the respect they deserve and makes for good relationships. But I really don't let my panties get in a twist about it.
One thing however is that I ALWAYS refer to elected officials by their first name only as I feel it let's them know that they work for me and not the other way around.
nachogrande
Member
MY INNER YANKEE IS SHOWING.
I can't wrap my head around the Mr/Mrs (first name thing). While being respectful, it's TOO formal & informal at the same time for me. Pick one or the other.
All my friends parents WERE Mr or Mrs & that respect never seemed to change, so neither did the name. Also referring to a stranger with a term reserved for relatives like Aunt or Uncle just feels wrong. It's as if it somehow dilutes the value of the term. I know it's small potato's, just the way it is, FOR ME.
I can't wrap my head around the Mr/Mrs (first name thing). While being respectful, it's TOO formal & informal at the same time for me. Pick one or the other.
All my friends parents WERE Mr or Mrs & that respect never seemed to change, so neither did the name. Also referring to a stranger with a term reserved for relatives like Aunt or Uncle just feels wrong. It's as if it somehow dilutes the value of the term. I know it's small potato's, just the way it is, FOR ME.
Here adults are usually called Mr or Ms (first name) by younger folks.
Now, in a restaurant or convenience store it is: darling, sweetie, sugar, honey, ect, etc.
Steve
Now, in a restaurant or convenience store it is: darling, sweetie, sugar, honey, ect, etc.
Steve
dougb1946
Member
I've been called worse. Years in retail management. I noticed, after changing careers, that people are much friendlier if you have a heavy tool in your hand.
Bullseye 2620
Member
This is definitely a regional thing. If a server in a restaurant in Iowa calls me "sugar," I'm going to look over my shoulder to see who she's really talking to, but here, it's just how people talk. It's like "hon" in Baltimore.
A scalding-hot, 12 on a scale of 1-10, X-ray tech was helping me up out of the MRI machine. My heart skipped at beat. Then she patted me on the shoulder and said, "Sir I did not want you to fall and break something." I would have preferred she kicked me someplace private.
I hoped for several weeks afterwards that death was imminent. I have gotten over it now-I guess my first clue that I am getting old should have been that I was getting an MRI in the first place!
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When it comes right down to it, I can only control how I address other people and lead by example. It is a lot easier to become less formal than more formal in addressing other people.
Civility is still recognized and appreciated. On my last job a lender contact said to me, "You're the politest person I deal with" or words to that effect.
Civility is still recognized and appreciated. On my last job a lender contact said to me, "You're the politest person I deal with" or words to that effect.
OLDSTER
Member
IMO, if we get upset over someone using our first name, there are more serious issues lurking other than old age
prairieviper
Member
My reply to those that take it upon themselves to call me by my first name because they don't know any better is "You can call me Mr. Viper."
For those that lack any common sense or upbringing and call me something like dude, buddy or some other catchy term, I usually say "Please don't call me ____." "You can call me Mr. Viper. For slow learners that can't control themselves and repeat the dude or buddy thing, I usually just remind them "It's still Mr. Viper." I've never had to go beyond that but my next move would be just to terminate the conversation and walk away.
For those that lack any common sense or upbringing and call me something like dude, buddy or some other catchy term, I usually say "Please don't call me ____." "You can call me Mr. Viper. For slow learners that can't control themselves and repeat the dude or buddy thing, I usually just remind them "It's still Mr. Viper." I've never had to go beyond that but my next move would be just to terminate the conversation and walk away.
It can be worse...my wife called in a pizza order, and I went in to pick it up (no drive through window or delivery at this place.) When I got home, the pizza wasn't made as my wife had specified, so she called to complain. The young lady she spoke to said, "Oh yes, I remember the elderly gentleman coming in to pick that up."
El Biblioitecario
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When I was a punk second lieutenant, our battery had a party for the officers and NCOs (a practice I don't recommend) After a considerable quantity of alcohol had been consumed an NCO grinned at me and asked if he should call me 'Roger' or 'Sir.'
I grinned back. "It's a pity I was never knighted. Then you could call me Sir Roger."
I grinned back. "It's a pity I was never knighted. Then you could call me Sir Roger."
It can be worse...my wife called in a pizza order, and I went in to pick it up (no drive through window or delivery at this place.) When I got home, the pizza wasn't made as my wife had specified, so she called to complain. The young lady she spoke to said, "Oh yes, I remember the elderly gentleman coming in to pick that up."
My brother is 3 years younger than me. We're of similar size and there is enough resemblance to infer that we are related. We get asked how we're related fairly often. One time we were going through the checkout line at the grocery store and the cashier asked if we were father and son. I think I just said that we were brothers. I didn't want to embarrass her and worry myself as to which one of us she thought was the father.
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